No I didn't pet a rabid wallaby OR carve my likeness in bar of lye soap. What I DID do was get Lasik surgery. CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT??? I can't. I still can't. I'm sitting here typing this without glasses/contacts/monocles or by braille and I still can't believe it.
I HAD LASIK SURGERY!!
That's right, it's bold, italicized AND underlined people! If that doesn't tell you just how earth-shattering this is, let me spell it out for you. Hello, my name is Missy and I have a slight (maybe not so slight) case of hypochondria. See, I just knew that if I did this simple, completely elective surgical procedure, that I would have to be immediately fitted with a white cane because I would lose an eye due to the microbial nature of air that caused a deep rooted infection of which literally ate my eyeball. I. Was. Certain.
Well color me shocked when not only did I NOT lose an eye, I gained some serious vision! Although, I won't lie... I might have freaked out a little when I woke up the next day and couldn't really focus on anything and nothing was clear. My doctor told me before the procedure that I would be able to resume normal activity - even work on my computer (you know, like I do for a living) - the very next day. Uhhh no - not for me. It took me a good week before I could see clearly, but here I am despite my certainties of blindness... seeing clearly.
One thing I forgot to do? Take before and after pictures. Probably a good thing though, nervous puking a pretty picture does not make. So for your viewing pleasure, I present to you "before" and after.
Clearly (pun fully intended), I should of done this a long time ago.